Energy is back!

After a strong emotional pain hit me out of nowhere I suddenly also experienced again the strong energy surges! I feel a lot of activity and movement inside my chest, especially in the evening while sitting relaxed and watching a movie! I can feel it through the front but also on the backside of my body. All in the height of the Heart center! On the back it sometimes feels as if density is pressing against the chair lean!

I also try to still my mind through meditation and I somehow managed last night to get some glimpses of what I experienced in the past when all of these energetic experiences started happening. I was lying on my back and just starring into nothingness. My visual screen was dark. However after some minutes of resting and relaxing I started seeing tiny little light flashes in the darkness. Like a distant camera was flashing on and off.

Then out of a sudden as I did not question anything that would happen or actually happened I saw a light flash which brought a visual with it. I saw for the blink of a second a man’s head. He had short blonde hair, blue eyes and his head appeared to be covered in blood! This visual came on suddenly as it always did in the past, when I first had my Kundalini Awakening. It startled me a tiny bit, or enough to create a heart jump, when it appeared. Sometime after this I fell asleep and I actually had a dream that somehow was connected to this visual!

DREAM: Swimming, two men, blood!

In the dream I was myself and I went to some kind of an indoor swimming pool. It looked beautiful and kind of like the pools in Germany! As I walked towards the edge and downstairs into the water a man passed me. He was taller than me, had short blonde hair and blue eyes. His face is burned into my mind I can still see him in front of me! He looked at me while passing with a very charming gaze! Like he was literally starring right into my soul. As I passed him and went deeper into the water I encountered another man who looked very similar to the first one! However I figured out at some point that they were both brothers! The second one was a little bit younger than the first. And it then happened that I felt embarrassed because of the looks these both men were giving me. I tried to hide from them. But in the end I was sitting at the back side of the pool having my feet inside the water, as the younger brother suddenly appeared and sat beside me. He talked to me, sadly the conversation is lost. However I remotely remember that he tried to make me feel happiness. He tried to convince me that his brother would like to see me. So somehow I must have agreed to this whole thing as both of them were irresistibly charming and beautiful at the same time!

The dream shifted and I entered a house, a beautiful home decorated with picture frames and flowers (red roses). As I entered the house I was lead to the entrance area and needed to wait for the older brother to arrive.

The dream shifted yet again and I see myself sitting on the floor having the same blood covering my face as I saw in the tiny 1 second vision before. Just that it was not me, but a man with short blonde hair, blue eyes! Which could have been one of the men of my dream! However why was I the one with the bloody face and why was I actually looking at myself??? How can I look at myself when I am the one who is obviously bleeding? It was like I saw myself from a different viewpoint.


Another strange dream

Yesterday was Wednesday so the day for me to sleep alone. Before I actually went to bed, we watched another movie… Since my husband is a movie composer and receives all the movies of the year, we usually watch them at the end of the year. Last evening we watched a movie called “Youth“. It was my turn to pick a movie out of the mixed row.
However I never know what I will grab as the movies are all backwards and no titles can be seen so it is always a surprise. The movie was oddly enough directly connected to husbands and my life. It was about an old man who once was a composer and conductor. He went to a Retreat and his daughter visited him and there was a moment when the daughter was on the floor, because her boyfriend left her for another woman and said “The woman was good in bed“.
There was a scene when the man (Fred) and his Daughter (Lena) were lying in a mud bath and he told her I am so sorry Lena, I understand you. And suddenly she went ahead and told him how little he understands, that he was always only interested in music, never hugged, kissed or appreciated his wife, never brought her flowers in 10 years etc. When I watched this scene, I was in awe, as it represents exactly how I feel. No coincidence that I caught this movie!
Then there was a scene where Fred and his friend made jokes about the monk who was meditating all day. And he said to the monk “you will never levitate!” In that moment I was somehow in a different state or something no idea, but I suddenly heard a very clear frequency pitch on my right ear. Instead of listening to it, I tried to focus on my heart center. But I did not know what it meant. Later in the movie however they showed that the monk indeed started levitating! Maybe the ring was a message that the said sentence was a lie.

When I finally went to bed, I was lying on my back and it was so cold, even while I completely tugged myself inside the blankets, the mattress once again would not get warmer, my knees started hurting because of the cold… And instead of staying awake and enduring the cold, I tried to fall asleep quickly. And I did, when I suddenly found myself having a very strange dream.

DREAM: Man with Blonde hair, Friend, marriage

I sadly do not remember the whole dream, but key elements were that I was together with a man who had blonde hair. Funny this blonde hair men with blue eyes come up every single time! Then a friend of ours visited us, she is a good girl and lives together with her boyfriend in Sardinia. So the dream now made no sense anymore. She looked at me while we were standing someplace and she asked me if we could move in together, but not only that, she also asked that we could then get married. And that’s when the dream suddenly got interrupted, because the alarm of my phone went off… I was completely perplexed and wanted to tell her that this was not possible. But before I could do so, I was kicked out of it.